mm last week after cello i felt the same kind of disappointment in myself as i have felt before

09/11/2006
is it hard to play an instrument?

technicalities and emotions

practice harder, open your heart wider

infuse yourself, drown out the voices

two become one

it is hard.

and one more post which i can't find but the content is as such:

how does it feel like to have eyes but not see, ears but not hear, emotions but not express?

and yesterday or sat, i happened to think about the whole thing and just felt the need to be released in God's presence, and when i learn to express myself in other ways, to be more confident in letting people see this other side of me, then will i be able to play music that is from the heart, which people can also feel.

ack! almost lost track of time! gotta go, meeting my BRAIN for blading and chrys and cheryl joining us for cycling later. whee! i miss not seeing brain everyday ): withdrawal symptoms. update more another time!